There’s a little bit of back story to this post..ok more like 10+years.

Esther is a high school friend of mine. I vaguely remember driving in her car to a local grocery store on a fuel tank that was empty. Anyways, I have lost over 100lbs and she Facebooked me years ago asking me how I did it. I told her and then she got picked up by WeighWatchers after she Youtubed her weight loss and then got an ad in Times Square (I guess I’ll take some credit for it ;).

Last week she posted this blog post and video where she discussed her true feelings about her body, especially since having a baby.

After this post I decided that I wanted to do something for myself, that shows who I really am. I can/could write all of the things which I hate about my body: wish I was stretch mark free, didn’t muffin-top, had a six pack. However, I have this the stage that it’s in. I have to love it, accept it for what it is…and look forward to its positive changes.

Positive Body Image 4

This is me.
This is me Exposed.

I have had this picture sitting on my desktop for a couple of days thinking to myself ‘Can I really post this online? Can I be as brave as Esther?’

Yes, because I am not perfect.
My body will probably NEVER be what I want it to be.

However, I have come SO far in loving who I am, shedding 100lbs, enduring the notion of Cancer being thrown around, toying with emergency surgery last year in Japan…and RECOVERING from an emotionally draining relationship where what you see above was not good enough.

It may not be perfect, but I am ok with that.


121 thoughts on “Exposed

  1. Michelle says:

    this is an awesome post, I think you look great. And btw, I am totally jealous of your long torso!

  2. Katy says:

    I am so proud of you! I am bookmarking this post for the next time I look in the mirror and say something disparaging about my body.

    I hope Caitlin finds a way to work this into Operation Beautiful!

  3. christieo says:

    I HEART your post for your honesty but above all for seeing what your body CAN DO and how wonderful it is. Hurrah to you for loving it! The body truly is an amazing thing!

  4. kathleen lisson says:

    This is an amazing tool. I wish that every woman would take a digital pic in their bikini and show what a success that every part has made them. A literal map of their success!

  5. Jackie says:

    Michelle……..sometimes your posts bring me to tears; you are so amazing and beautiful, and I am thankful for the years I have known you. I know I come from the opposite end of the spectrum, but I too have struggled over my body as well over the years. Your (and Esther’s) insights help me so much – especially currently almost done with my 3rd pregnancy, I am having a difficult time watching my body be destroyed for a good cause πŸ™‚ You are truly incredibly beautiful, inside and out, and I love everything about you.

    • Mish says:

      It makes me SO sad when women (not you Jackie) beat themselves up after giving the beauty of life to a human being. I love what you wrote, because your child–the finger painted ‘what is that’, the tears, the laughs, the firsts of everything is worth every single stretch mark. I hope you find the beauty in that Jackie.

  6. Reluctant Blogger says:

    Yes, well done you. And you look great.

    I think we all have things we don’t like about our bodies. I know I do. But I think with age we become more accepting. I am mostly happy with mine these days – just relieved that bits still work and aren’t falling off.

    As long as we are healthy that is all that really counts.


  7. Allison says:

    Ohhh my God… You are a role model girl! This is the most amazing, REAL post I’ve seen in so long. It so positive… You have made an incredible journey and have overcome so much… that’s something to be so very proud of! You’re gorgeous! And SUCH an inspiration ! πŸ™‚

  8. Elina says:

    What an inspiring post! Thank you for reminding us all that we don’t need to be perfect to love ourselves, and be loved πŸ™‚

    • Mish says:

      it’s so interesting that people call me brave. I didn’t ever intend to evoke this, i just wanted to be honest. Thank you for stopping by.

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  10. moonduster (Becky) says:

    Oh my goodness! You are beautiful! It’s wonderful of you to post this! Very brave! πŸ™‚ you look fantastic, and congratulations on losing over 100 pounds.

    I have lost 120 pounds so far, and I don’t know if I can be as brave as you and post an “exposed” picture, but now you’ve got me thinking about it.

    • Mish says:

      Thank you. I sometimes can’t believe that I have actually done what I’ve done. Amazing job on your weight should be SO proud of yourself

  11. Dinneen - Eat Without Guilt says:

    Great post Mish! More women need to accept their body the way it is !

    And actually — you ARE perfect. Because what does ‘perfect’ really mean? In my eyes, and those who really love you, see you as perfect just the way you are πŸ™‚

  12. Melanie - girlgetstrong says:

    Great post – it wasn’t until after 4 kids and I was on a really long run that I had the revelation that I darn well should *appreciate* what my body has done for me. Will ‘expose’ this week and link to you if that is okay?

    • Mish says:

      Melanie, first of all what an amazing thing–FOUR KIDS. I think that we as women need to stop, and appreciate our bodies. I truly feel that we would have so much less issues with body image if we did that. Link away and let me know when you’ve one it please. I would like to stop by and see what your thoughts are.

  13. Danon Pascoa says:

    You exposed makes me feel so much.
    I know that I dont have the balls to do this; although, I do wish I did. Congrats to you and many blessings to go along with your persuit.

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  15. Rose says:

    I just received your comment and popped over here. I saw this Exposed posting going on – but did not submit my own. I should have. I particularly like “lifts bales of hay” mainly because I have too πŸ™‚

    Thank you for your note; it really meant a lot.

    This is an inspiration – you were nervous about posting it, but you did it. Thank you for doing this. It’s helped not only me but all of those names above mine in this list.

  16. The Voracious Vegan says:

    This is so beautiful. I always cringe when my friends start berating and picking apart every bit of their body when we should be CELEBRATING our amazing bodies! This was inspirational and amazing, I might just do it myself. Thank you VERY much!

  17. karen@fitnessjourney says:

    Fantastic post. I always admire people who are willing to expose themselves (perceived flaws and all!) I remember when Jamie Lee Curtis did a photo shoot in a sports bra and tiny shorts after gaining weight. I really liked her before, but I had a new respect for her.

    It’s freeing to tell the world that I’m okay with who I am just as I am.

  18. Ria says:

    This is brilliant.

    A sincere thank you, from someone who is a little more appreciative of these hiking legs πŸ™‚

  19. cristina says:

    You’re really beautiful!! Thanks!! I agree with Jenelle here above: “great message” (for men and women!).
    Cristina, an italian woman really similar to you!
    (sorry for my bad english)

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  21. Glenda Spain says:

    Read about your success story on Tim Walker’s blog and am so happy to see this posted. Good inspiration for all of us to treat ourselves more kindly… to you!

  22. Mia says:

    i love your skin and your flesh is very sexy. I especially love the way you think and hope that soon enough we’ll all be freed from the “barbie-obsession”

  23. Cheri Spain says:

    I cannot tell you just what reading this means to me. I have struggled with myself since I was a very young girl. My mother and grandmother always made me feel as though my body and looks were all I had going for me. If it wasn’t for those no one would ever love me including them. As a child growing up my weight would fluctuate I would chunk up just before a big growing spurt. But they never saw it that way. So I found solace in eating as a way to show love to myself since I knew no one was going to love me anyway. I went from a weight/beauty abusing mother to a man who did the same. And then another and yet another abusive relationship. In my early thirties I decided to change myself or my appearance. I went from 300lbs to a extremely thin 120lbs. I met a guy and the new thin me was not good enough for him either, my boobs needed to be lifted or as he preferred a complete boob job and not to mention the tummy tuck to hide the stretched skin. He even went as far as to research ways to hide my stretch marks.

    Now I am looking forward to the day that I will be happy inside my skin and happy with me. Until then I will stick with my dog as he does not judge me by my appearance and is always happy to see me and be with me.

    Thank you so very much for this entry it tells me that I will be happy with me.

    • Mish says:

      Thank you for sharing your story. I to had a relationship where ‘I have a problem with your weight’ and ‘I don’t think I could continue dating you because I am afraid you’d gain all the weight that you lost (120lbs) back’. I get it. May you continue to embrace the beauty that you are from your soul outwards.

      • Mia says:

        wow i cant believe u can actually FIND such a**h***** that call themselves men. couldn’t they at least feel ashamed of just SAYING that?

  24. Mia says:

    and btw, do u really have to look like a model to be sexy?
    and ARE models really desirable? (for me, not really)

  25. Monica says:

    Just read about this on MizFit – this is wonderful. I love it. So glad to have found your blog and the blogs of all the other inspiring people who joined in to expose themselves. You guys rock!

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  28. land animal says:

    Oh wow. This is awesome. I have some before and after pictures of my weight loss. They are similar to this shot (I am in a bikini and my head is not visible). I have wanted to post them to show my journey, which has been so successful, but I just can’t. They are too personal. I am not ready expose myself yet…

    • Mish says:

      Oh man do I know what you mean. When and if you’re ready…let me know πŸ™‚ First congrats on your weight loss. If you decide, we’d love to have you as part of the family.

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