This one is FOCUSED

Focus is where we find our peace in life.

From Natalie:


I just have to tell you that I absolutely love reading your blog and from it have learned so much not only about myself but obviously about you! I don’t think you realize how many people you’re actually reaching by being brutally honest and just saying, well, this is me…deal with it. I like you have struggled my WHOLE life with my weight. I have let people tell me I’m not good enough, I”m not pretty enough, I’m not enough of anything and I AM DONE WITH NOT BEING ENOUGH! I am ME and take it or leave it, this is me. Your blog has been so honest and been such a great inspiration to finally love me and accept me and I can honestly say for the first time in 26 years, I like myself. Since March I have lost almost 55 pounds, am in a size 14-16 jeans and a L-XL shirt and I honestly don’t remember when I was that small. I don’t know what it finally was that made me change, but I like the more active me and I like (okay, sorta like) running but I no longer do it for anyone else, I do it for me. There are days when I can’t stand going to the gym or days when I go, seriously I have to eat this salad and I will never be able to just sit there and eat and eat eat, but I do enjoy my food, I do sometimes not go to the gym and I do like me, even when I overeat and stuff the cheesecake in my face. I don’t know why I felt the need to share this, but I really hope you know that in a small way you’ve helped me, with a lot of blood, sweat and prayers, I’m becoming the person I always wanted to be and for once I don’t think it’s unreal, but it’s a reality. Thank you Michelle, I look forward to new posts and congrats on being published! That’s crazy exciting!

I basically wanted to run through the Facebook message that she sent and give her a hug. I loved what she wrote ‘I no longer do it for anyone else, I do it for me!’ This e-mail has come at a great time, because I have been getting sucked, mildly, back into the whole ‘I want to lose weight’ focus monster…which never enables me to shift my focus into a positive frame of mind. It’s funny when we the focus of our lives totally on weight loss…it brings this intense level of perfection, guilt, and ‘I SHOULD’. The binge monster feeds on this and frankly….I am over it. This morning Diane came to the rescue:

Looking back, I realize that when I focused on some goals for myself rather than just the number, things began to turn around. Yes, I still wanted to weigh less than 300 pounds, but I realized there were also other things I wanted to do with my life that weren’t all about weight.

I sat there..and said..Ok…so where’s my focus? It’s on eating clean, working out to cross a finish line, keeping my faith in my heart, and enjoying the time I have with my friends and family.

Weight loss is NO WHERE to be found. For the weight loss baby..I am throwing it out with the bath water.

Thank you Natalie for showing that changing your lifestyle is what eventually makes you healthy. An unwavering approach to living your life to the fullest…is where you find the peace that you’ve been craving.


12 thoughts on “This one is FOCUSED

  1. eaternotarunner says:

    GREAT post. I need some concrete goal to focus on, or else I get crazy about how much I should exercise and how much I should be eating blah blah blah….and it just makes me sad. I agree that that “weight loss” mentality just feeds the binge monster…it does for me!

  2. gemfit says:

    As usual, GREAT POST. I’ve always found that having concrete goals that don’t involve weight loss are more motivating than anything else. It’s got to come from inside not outside. Yes, losing weight is nice but it should be a benefit from reaching towards your goals, not the only thing to be gained.

  3. Ali says:

    LOVE IT.

    on that note:
    I am doing a project for school, and I was wondering if you would answer a question for me:
    What do you love most about health and wellness blogging?

  4. Megan @ Healthy Hoggin says:

    Oh, this post could have come at a better time! I, too, have felt that WEIGHT LOSS MONSTER creeping into my thoughts, which is almost always followed by the BINGE MONSTER. It’s nice to be reminded to keep my focus on my health and happiness, rather than a silly number on the scale.

    I love your blog. Thank you for being so honest, because I totally relate!!

  5. stephanie says:

    Gaaaa!! Your cinnamon cranberry crunch looks AWESOME, I am drooling!! Care to share the recipe? πŸ™‚

  6. Reluctant Blogger says:

    Isn’t that wonderful that you reached out to her through your blog and made a difference and now she and other people are doing the same for you.

    Blogging and online communication are so fab for keeping us going and preventing things from getting us down.

  7. Hilda says:

    Hi Mish,

    I’m a big fan of focussed intention on how you want to be and feel rather than achieving a specific outcome.

    About three years ago I set the intention to be a fit and healthy person with a healthy cholestorel level. (To be honest, weight hasn’t been a major issue in my life, but at the time I was at an unhealthy level for my height and frame, and had very high cholestorel. I had spent a year or more trying to lose weight on and off, but my motivation was always around the way I looked, and anything I lost was temporary. )

    Anyway, when I set this intention, my energy around it was very different. I’ve never owned a weighing scales, and didn’t focus on any numbers. I just focussed on the intention to be healthy, and I found myself making healthy food and exercise choices. If I looked at a sausage, instead of drooling, I thought of my heart and I no longer wanted it.

    And without ‘trying’ to lose weight I did exactly that. And making healthy choices are now integrated into my lifestyle, and my weight has remained more or less stable without me having to think about it. Of course, it fluctuates a little, but I don’t stress about it. Instead I look for where my life is a little out of balance and set the intention to come back into balance.

    I’m sure you too will find your focussed intention to more powerful and empowering than needing to be a specific weight πŸ™‚

    all the best,


    • Mish says:

      It’s amazing the energy change that is so apparent from ‘losing weight’ to ‘healthy living’. It just makes life so much easier. The question doesn’t become ‘can I start over tomorrow’, i becomes ‘is this a choice which is going to add to my health?’. That is a much more empowering decision.

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