Try Me!

What do you do when you mess up?

MOVE ON?

I had a ‘kitchen sink‘ incident last night w/ dark chocolate and bread. My naturo said to try some gluten and small doses of chocolate and see how I went. She probably didn’t mean 3/4 of a huge bar or 4 pieces of bread. This morning was hard. Last night sucked. I made it a week. It was sparked because I didn’t feel ‘deprived’ anymore. I felt free. I wanted to taste everything I hadn’t had in SO long. I was also very dehydrated.

Yoga, thank you for making me hold those warriors, those dancers. For reminding me that I am beautiful. That every day is a new day.

Thank you juicer for making me an awesome recovery drink (celery, cucumber, 1/2 carrot, spinach, garlic). And to my porridge (soaked quinoa, pear, walnuts cinnamon, walnuts, stevia) I love it.

I am not here to hide or bitch or complain about what I did. I am here to be honest. Yep I f-ed up. Now I am moving on. It was interesting last night afterwards. I actually wasn’t sad. I was pissed. It f-ed up my ability to go running morning this morning, my ability to enjoy my last night, my sleep. I don’t feel like engaging in the thing which rob me of that.

For the first time I felt empowered after a binge and not guilty/depressed/lonely. I felt empowered. I felt like it was testing me new found strength to see if I could overcome and move on.

TRY ME!

When have you felt empowered by something?


9 thoughts on “Try Me!

  1. Joy (A Little Bit Fit) says:

    Good for you!
    “Failure’ is not the falling down, but the staying down.” – Mary Pickford

    It isn’t our mistakes don’t define who we are, but the way we recover and react to them. Amazing recovery!

  2. Lara (Thinspired) says:

    I actually had a day like this recently and thought about emailing you, but I didn’t want to trigger anything. It’s so tough, isn’t it? Actually just when I feel like I’ve got a hang on it, that is always when a problem starts. Sigh. Good for you in not letting it get you down. I love the Jillian MIchaels analogy: If your car gets a flat tire, what do you do? Do you get out and slash the other three tires? No! You just fix the one tire and keep on drivin’!

  3. Elisabeth says:

    This is similar to the conclusion that I came to after struggling so long with my random binges (I called them “outbursts”…lol). Eventually I asked myself “if this is making you feel so BAD physically, why do you keep doing it?” These days, of course I overeat sometimes, but it is much less frequently, and I don’t go ape$hit on carbs anymore. I could polish off a whole loaf of raisin bread. Now that I don’t eat things like that (because of the way I feel when I do), I don’t even want to eat them. Interesting how that happens.

  4. missyrayn says:

    I felt empowered when I had a hard day this week with not being able to work out and stress at work and being sick and I didn’t turn to diet coke while at the store. Instead I bought some fruit and enjoyed it. And now I’m not in pain.

    Good for you for moving forward. You are doing amazing at it one day at a time.

  5. plamarie says:

    I know exactly what you are talking about. I go crazy when snacks are around and I am dehydrated. I always pick back up the next day with juice too 🙂 I think these are the times that help me realize how bad I want to meet my goal. For every slip up, I will have 10 good days. Before you know it, the habits get stronger and more natural.

  6. Sarah says:

    What makes me feel most empowered is to excel at something I really care about and want to do well at. When I do well at work, for instance, I function better in the rest of my life because I take pride in being good at what I do. When I’m not focusing on what I need to get done at work (this applies to when I was in Uni as well), then it becomes a cycle of depression because I don’t feel good enough, then I have slip up after slip up with my health…almost like I don’t deserve it.

    It’s a very punishment-and-reward mentality, but if channeled it can make me feel very empowered! It’s just a matter of using the empowerment, but stopping the negative thoughts that can spiral when I don’t do as well as I would have liked!

    I see the deprivation you were talking about as well in this. That cycle of deprivation and reward can trigger these events. But you’re recognising where they are coming from, and that’s a huge step because, for all the times you slip up there are probably 20 more times that you don’t (3 meals a day, 7 days a week)!! Those are pretty good odds 🙂

  7. MizFit says:

    It is such a TREMENDOUS victory to be able to take anything that happens to you (be it a binge or another “disappointment”) and process it as an EXPERIENCE.

    as INFORMATION and just move forward.

  8. love2eatinpa says:

    so many people would throw in the towel after your experience, but not you, you get empowered by it! way to keep things in perspective! it was one night. one night out a gazillion. no worries!

  9. All Women Stalker says:

    Just a couple of days ago, my boyfriend and I had a serious talk. It was heartbreaking but it made me realize that I have my own life to live. I am now going to be more serious with my fitness goals and plans. And of course, with all the other plans in my life.

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