Doubt

Everytime I practice a handstand…I get a bit stronger.

Half-a-second longer.

I can’t let the doubt that has riddle my mind for so longer fester like an open wound, if I am going to complete it.

When I look at myself I think, ‘Who am I really?’

Am I the girl who lost all the weight?
Am I the girl who is STILL struggling with bingeing?
Am I the girl who exposed herself online?
Am I the girl who has a messed up tummy?
Am I the girl, who is their own worst enemy?

I am more than that. I am more than what I’ve told myself that I am. I am letting go of my own doubt.

I am beautiful, strong, intelligent, more than what I have ever thought I could be.

I am scared to be all that I want to be, because frankly opening up myself and shedding my doubt is probably one of the hardest things I have to admit and do for myself.

It’s been my identity for so long. My protective blanket.

It’s not satisfying me anymore. I am taking this break until whenever in February…to really think about who I am. What I want to give to you my readers.

More importantly, what I want to give to myself.