A Joyfully Question Filled Journey

A Self-Love reflection from Brandon

I love that I’m a naturally happy and positive person. I almost always have a smile on my face. I always try to look on the bright side of any situation. I always try to cheer up friends and family when they’re down. I don’t sweat the small stuff. I always try to give people the benefit of the doubt. I love to smile and laugh, and I do so often. I figure this is the only life we have, so why not enjoy the ride as much as possible?

I’m still learning to love my body. I’ve been overweight for as long as I can remember, and I’ve never been terribly fond of my body. But this is the only body I’ve got, so I’ve got to learn to love what I have. And part of loving my body is taking care of it by making healthy eating choices and getting in shape. That way, I’ll get to enjoy an even longer relationship with my body.

Before I start…here are some answers to my call for questions. Send me more, if you’d like!

1. How did you stay strong during your weight loss? What was your stronghold?

Man I wish I could tap into that one summer when I dropped about 35lbs. I would have to say working out and getting into a routine when cheating, taking a short cut and making excuses wasn’t allowed.

Now, for me..it’s really about creating a lifestyle where I don’t have an abusive food relationship and a neglectful fitness relationship. My stronghold throughout is that I WILL not go back to where I started. When I gained the 35lbs that I have to get off, I couldn’t/can’t afford new clothes. However, that hasn’t motivated me totally. I think it’s really about making fitness, healthy lifestyle a direction in your life with exceptions of indulgence. It’s hard, because I’ve start to identify myself as the girl who binges at night. However, each night/day/meal that I don’t I am slowly crafting myself into the balanced person I want to be.

2. Besides moving across the world to AU (that took guts and heart!), what would you consider the one craziest thing you have ever done?

Booking a ‘holiday’ to India for four weeks by myself. I did go with this tour company, but I flew into New Delhi by myself. Smog filled 4am arrival and befriended a girl who took me to my hotel in the middle of the night. I woke up, brushed my teeth with bottled water. Walked outside, turned around, went into my hotel room and cried for an hour. Sucked it up, got ripped off with a private driver and got my feet wet. It was hard, crazy, and amazing.

I also drove around East Timor on the back of a small scooter. That was stupid.

3.Do you have any siblings?

1 sister (23), 1 step-brother (19) 1 half-brother (13)

————–

I went to bed and woke up with a MAJOR tooth ache. I then went over to the ‘dentist’ in the house (a 3rd year dental student) at dinner and complained about my tooth.

It’s discoloured

Low and behold…my tooth is discoloured…root canal anyone? So I panicked, googled horrible pictures.

I gathered my composure and then did an impromptu yoga session with my students. It was so fun. They came dressed up and we did about an hour of yoga. Some planks, abs, and of course relaxation. I know that I have bitched and complained about my job, but I had something happen to me this past weekend when I was baby-sitting 50 of them while they got drunk on cheap beer.

A little excerpt from my journal

To say that you shouldn’t be focus on an end goal is a bit scary. There also needs to be the caveat that totally focusing on the end goal as your definition of who you are–is also damaging.

The question becomes: How do you actually set goals so that you’re getting to where you want to be, but also ENJOYING THE JOURNEY?

I admit it: I HAVE NEVER ENJOYED THE JOURNEY!

Not when I was losing weight.
Not when I was gaining weight.
Not when I was having sex (it’s been a LONG time).
Not when I was travelling at times.
Not when I was bingeing.
Not when I was discovering and transforming myself.

What if I just chose to enjoy the journey?

It hit me like a ton of bricks. What time i have wasted hating the journey I’ve felt like I’ve needed to lead. I took this mentality to my full-day of nursing classes today. I couldn’t believe that I was ACTUALLY in the process of becoming a nurse. I couldn’t believe that you could spend 20 minutes talking about hand washing. However, it didn’t matter—cause I was enjoying the journey.

You… Enjoying it? Hating it?


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8 thoughts on “A Joyfully Question Filled Journey

  1. Joy (A Little Bit Fit) says:

    You are so right! I have found that it is so much easier to make healthy decisions when I am in the mindset of choice rather than imperative. I WANT to eat a healthy foods because of the way it makes me feel, rather than I HAVE to eat healthy foods because I want to lose weight.

    Mindset makes all the different in the journey! Best of luck in enjoying yours!

  2. Tami says:

    If I am enjoying the journey or not depends on the day! Sometimes it is smooth sailing and all is well. Other days I am not happy with where I am at and wish I was naturally thin!

  3. Kara (@ Kara's Marathon) says:

    I’m learning to enjoy the process too, largely because the process NEVER ENDS. I used to think that there would be some massive change when I hit a certain number on the scale, a tickertape parade and then I could go back to eating whatever I wanted and not gain weight. I couldn’t be more wrong!

    I have to think that the journey IS the destination, and embrace that in order to be successful.

  4. love2eatinpa says:

    wow, that is huge for you and i’m happy for ya!
    do i love or hate my journey? i guess i don’t look at it that way. it’s my life. i’m doing what i gotta do to recover from compulsive overeating. i guess i like where i am right now. so now i have an answer, i like my journey. (i wimped out and went in-between!)

  5. Dinneen @ Eat Without Guilt says:

    I love what Kara said in her comment “the journey IS the destination”…well said.

    I’ve learned to enjoy all my life journeys. Okay, I may not always be enjoying them right in the moment, but I’m learning to live IN the moment. And realize that though it might seem like I’m taking a detour, it actually IS my path. I need to take that path right now to get where I need to be.

    And wherever I am in life is where I need to be.

  6. missyrayn says:

    I didn’t enjoy the journey of losing the weight at first. I hated that I wasn’t “normal.” But when I realized I liked who I was becoming as I got fitter I started doing thing I enjoyed about the journey. Making food I enjoyed instead that was just healthy and doing workouts I liked instead of those that burned the most calories.

    And with my job I have to love my journey every day or I would have quit a long time ago. Being a pastor is hard.

    • Mish says:

      That is such a good thing for me to think about. I can’t hate it, I must look at whatever I do in life as a good thing. Otherwise I will go through never enjoying anything.

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