That something in my brain…more my soul…is like ‘Ok, Michelle we’re ready to move on from this place’.
I stand here with my baggage packed, not knowing exactly where I am going, or how I am going to get there. But I know it’s me, myself and I on this journey.
If I have to metaphorically walk, run, hitch-hike or catch a bus….I am going to get away from this really REALLY negative and black mental state that I’ve been in for a bit.
There comes a point in all of our lives when we realise that ‘THIS ISN’T WORKING ANYMORE’.
There have been many people who have helped me ‘add to and pack my luggage’. But I would have to say that in the past two weeks, I have had my eyes so widely opened to my old patterns that it was frighteningly clear…and yet refreshing. There comes a point in ALL of our lives when we have to dig DEEP.
Begin to pack our own luggage and quit blaming others, the suitcase, the early check-out of the hotel….it’s really us!
REALLY deep to get to the root of what is causing us to stay in the ‘shitty hotel with baggage strewn everywhere’.
I was speaking with one of my friends and I told them ‘You have to make yourself into the person that you want to become..and in that process you will find the person, things, goals that align with the person that you want to be..and not for the person, things, goals that you think you should be’.
I am scared out of my gourd to think that I am going to leave behind my identity. That’s right, my identity of the woman who struggles and ‘just can’t seem to get there’, cause there’s comfort in that. I do believe that many times, the 95% of people who gain back the weight that they’ve lost, is due to the inability to see themselves as the person that they’ve become.
I am trying not to look at this as a new identity…rather a new manifestation of myself…where I don’t deny or forget where I have been. We learn from our mistakes, our roots, insecurities and strengths.
I am exhausted, at a level that I haven’t felt in a very long time.
However, I am more hopeful than I have been in a very long time.
Anybody want to come on a road trip 🙂 ?
Harnessing My Intuitive Self