I went to a party this weekend.
There was pizza, cupcakes, endless veggies sticks with hummus. Bottles of wine. Cheese. Meat. CHOCOLATE!
I didn’t eat any of it
I have been reading through Women, Food & God and have had a HUGE thought come over me.
IT’S NOT ABOUT THE TEMPTATION OF THE FOOD, IT’S ABOUT THE EMOTIONAL TEMPTATION OF THE FOOD!
When I used to go to dinner parties/buffets/pot-lucks I would go down one of these paths:
- Starve all day long and then eat as many points that I had left.
- Screw it I’ll start tomorrow
- Pick around, ‘be good’ and then usually feel so deprived eat in secret at home
- Be good, go to bed feeling like I had ‘finally conquered it’ cause I stayed within my point limit–happened not very often.
I see it all the TIME. ‘I just can’t give up that cake, cookies, wine, cheese, crackers….those are like crack to me. I just can’t stop myself’. It’s like the food…an inanimate object has this power over our pysche that is beyond recognisable…unless you’ve lived through these mental conversations which can consume hours, days prior…and the guilt of ‘blowing it’ afterwards.
I am SO been there.
As I looked at the food this weekend I had a choice: keep the emotion wrapped up in the food OR just see it as what it is..food. Enjoy it, but more importantly stop hiding behind it in social situations and let myself converse with people.
I chose the later.
I got in my car and drove home. I didn’t praise myself for not blowing my point/calorie allotment or from stearing away from certain foods or for being good.
What I did was praise myself for taking the emotions out of the food and honoring my new found path.
I almost need to write this post, because I have been struggling this week, especially with baking becuase it’s my ‘unwinding’ activity that is wrapped up in all sorts of comfort emotions…but what it does is puts me in vulnerable situations where I overeat on shit that doesn’t help me get to where I want to be. I still
struggle am finding my way. The point is, is that awareness is the first part of all of our journeys in life.
So, what is the ONE thing that gets ya every time? Tell me…what emotions do you wrap it up with?