The Cycle of ‘Struggling’

I was sitting on the toilet this morning, TMI. And I was looking at the toilet paper dispenser


It’s a circle. I was reflecting upon the place that I am in today…and yes..I have ROUGH moments..BUT I am learning something quite profound. It got me thinking about the thought patterns that keep playing in my head…it’s like a cycle that I can’t shake sometimes.

I have identified so MUCH with the cycle of dieting.


BUT, what I got to thinking about today was the idea of identify with the struggle of it all.


That ‘struggle’ becomes this constant reminder that we have ‘something else to work on’. It’s been very interesting and I think that even those of us who find ourselves in a better place, have to release the idea of ‘struggling’ to feel complete.

This is a comment by Katie on this post

I think the reason I struggle to live in the Journey State you’re talking about – and instead focus solely on the finish line – is because I’m constantly feeling unsatisfied, discontent, wanting MORE.

This comment made me think even more because of something that Mary tweeted today

It’s crazy. I have all these amazing things happening in my life but I keep catching myself criticzing/putting myself down. What the..?

You know what..I am NOT going to give you some ‘happy clappy’ advice. Because it’s more than that. It’s actually letting go of the struggle mentality. It’s so tiered, this process, and I can promise you that everyone goes through it differently.

For me I had to admit there was a problem, find great resources/people, get it out of my head, and paying attention to things that really have me frozen. It’s not easy peasy. It’s not one quote, or one person, or one event. It’s the faith, determination, awareness, patience to keep going.

But, when you’re on this road, or you’ve gotten and/or are getting to your Journey State, there’s a part for some of us who have to give up the idea that we have to be in a struggle.

Part of living is to realise that there will be struggles…but it’s not a struggle that needs to be lived.



16 thoughts on “The Cycle of ‘Struggling’

  1. Jules - Big Girl Bombshell says:

    Oh my thoughts are MANY! First of all, I think that life is a spiral. Round and Round, back and forth..For me it is when I can see how this fits to that, oh and over here this works. etc. It’s not just one thing. For me, the struggle is really when you fight against who you are, what you have become, what you think others think of you, and what you think of yourself.

    When you can connect all of it, walking your talk, FEELING your body, your thoughts, and your spiritual connection then and only then will it be living. Things that seem to be a struggle seem to lessen their hold and just are…

    Deal with the fear.. and the thoughts change…..

  2. Blubeari says:

    Whew, girl! That is mighty philosophical for being inspired by a TP dispenser. 😉 But on a more serious note, I’ve seen that circle my phone life, and in my job I’ve seen a carbon copy of it with drugs. It’s a rare thing that people escape it. In that job, the only time I ever saw people escape addiction was when they had a serious reason to stop. Not just a good enough one, but one that was bigger than their addiction. I haven’t found my reason yet, I suppose.

  3. Ms. Moran says:

    Love your graphics. The purple one especially sums it all up. I mean I can be great – rock solid – but only for so long. Then I slip up, feel badly and the whole thing goes again. Right now I’m trying to start feeling good about myself and see if it helps me eat better, rather than trying to eat better to make me feel good about myself. Too soon to tell if this flip-flop philosophy will work, but you are definitely onto something!!

  4. Miz says:

    love the graphics as well.
    and am avoiding making this comment a post.

    for me it was and is all about the trust
    believing in myself and trusting that I really do know, in my heart of hearts, whats best


    • Mish says:

      I find it amazing that your body knows what it needs. It’s like those little scrolling message boards. Your body is sending messages, it’s just if we choose to stop, read, acknowledge and surrender.

  5. KCLAnderson (Karen) says:

    An apt quote I came across this morning: “You desire to know the art of living, my friend? It is contained in one phrase: make use of suffering.” ~ Henri Frederic Amiel, philosopher and writer (1821-1881)

  6. Katie @ Health for the Whole Self says:

    Such wisdom!!! I love that you connected it to your previous post about the Journey State. I definitely think that I’ve been in a place of identifying myself as a “struggler,” if you will, although I never thought about it quite like that before. It shouldn’t be so hard to just LET GO, but it is. But it’s worth it.

  7. Laurie says:

    I love this, toilet paper metaphor included. (Also yesterday’s post).
    Things to chew on…better than crappy food, I say!

  8. Foodie McBody says:

    Beautiful! This is such a great post. And what struck me is that for you, diet = stop listening to body/deprivation. And for me, “diet” more equals mindful eating, means = MORE listening to body, MORE paying attention and in fact even more food. So I guess it is not the same as a diet. But for me “not being on plan” == SUPER NOT listening to my body but just only listening to my Inner Gollum, who is like DONUTS DONUTS CUPCAKES MORE MORE ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

    So… instead of “diet rules” what if your only rule was paying attention to your self and your body? How would that feel?

    • Mish says:

      When I just pay attention to myself it’s a double fold..are you ready for this (don’t smack me) 1. Feels like bliss. I FINALLY am ‘getting it’ 2. I feel empty. If I stop at content I want more to feel full. So yeah, just listening to my body is hard sometimes, because if I am content then I have to focus on other things. So if I stuff myself..then I can still block everything out with the guilt that I induce within myself for ‘messing up’. about being honest–which was helpful. Thanks for asking that.

  9. SeattleRunnerGirl says:

    I could NOT agree with you more. I recently discovered that I DO have the tools to make healthy, good choices. I AM capable of maintaining a healthy weight. I DON’T need a “diet” program or anything else external to guide my choices. But for a long time, I was so USED to living in the STRUGGLE that I couldn’t see beyond it, you know? It took a pretty drastic choice to give me the space to step back and REALIZE all that I’ve learned, and to know that I can let go of the struggle now.

    It’s not perfect and it’s not every moment – sometimes I slip back into that mentality. But it IS freeing and a victory and life/hope-giving to know that as I continue to grow and learn, I will be able to step further and further from the struggle. As my trust in myself and my body increases, my attachment to the struggle will diminish.

    GREAT post!

  10. Ashley @ Nourishing the Soul says:

    I think it’s so hard for me to give up the struggle because if I give it up, I’ll be left with…. me. I think that it’s frightening to think about the possibility of being enough just being ourselves. We worry if it’s going to be enough for the rest of the world. And dieting – and other distractions – allow us to feel like we’re pursuing being more. When really these activities just drive us further from ourselves. I love the way you laid it out graphically!

  11. Pensarepink says:

    Have you ever read Brooke Castillo’s “If I’m So Smart, Why Can’t I Lose Weight?” As someone who has struggled with both losing weight and reconnecting to my body’s wisdom (when to eat, when to rest, when to move) I’ve found her insights really helpful. Where “Women, Food, and God” is more theoretical, “If I’m So Smart” is very practical and down-to-earth.

    • Mish says:

      I haven’t read that specific blog post..but I have her blog in my reader. I’ll need to go back and read that. I LOVE her.

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