Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,whenever you face trials of many kinds,

because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.

Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

~James 1:2-4

Hands down one of my all time most favourite verses. A friend of mine had asked for prayer and I sent her this. So did another friend. God works in fascinating ways sometimes. When we need to be uplifted, we are.

As I read through the daily reading of Made to Crave I realised that it was more about having self-control….which is fine….but I think it’s bigger than just self-control. Or at least it is for me. I have often questioned a lot about my food/eating/weight journey. What on God’s green earth is God doing in my life to be handing out this path for me? What am I being used for? Why?

As a new parent the trials are vast, well I think as a parent the trials are vast. Everything is new, breastfeeding hurts, my milk supply wasn’t enough so we reached out to donors to provide breast milk for us. And you know what…I am being used. Three friends (all over the world) have decided to donate their extra supply, one friend kept breastfeeding after finding support inspired by us, and even a local news agency has reached out to feature our story. I’m connecting with women who share similar stories and have found a place to unravel their grief.

I have been tested so many times as a new mom. I have been tested in every.single.aspect of my being. Beginning with sleep deprivation and ending with how to best go about repairing my relationship with food and exercise to impart a balanced approach for Ainsle. BUT more so, a balanced approach for myself.

I do not even begin to understand why we are given the trials that we have been given. Have no idea. However, when we look around the world some of the most inspiring people are those who just go with the trials…who persevere over them…and use the gifts that they’ve been given. If that’s donating money to charity for a cause, starting a memorial race, volunteering in local schools, going on mission trips, or changing their lives..the inspiring are those who use their trials to become mature and complete.

For along time, I mean five years, I have fought against my trials with food and weight loss. I fought hard. It felt unfair. I have felt doomed so many times, I couldn’t even remember. But one thing being a parent has made me realise is that you just have to relax and do your absolute best…every single day. I’ve also learned that a lot of trials in our lives need us to afford more rest, patience and love thrown at them.

So today, my clingy child is going to be cuddled. In turn, I’m going to take that lesson for myself and afford myself more grace and perseverance.

Mish xo

One thought on “Trials

  1. Sarah says:

    Oh, yes. That balance of relaxing in the role of being a mama and doing your best. Motherhood is HARD work, but you’re doing it. Ainslie has everything she needs in a mama like you who is so introspective and loves her (and others!) so fiercely.

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